Having just met you at the Body, Mind, Spirit Expo in Seattle, I wanted to become your “mum.” I am so very proud of you and I just love your writing and your story. I feel the pain and emptiness within the pages of your book, however I am so pleased that you have been able to crawl through the darkness and into the light. I was really pleased to meet Lorraine , your sweety, and what an honour it was to give both of you a hug. I could hardly put your book down this morning.

 

Hi Samadhi,
It's me-Teofana from the Seattle Expo. It was really nice to meet you and Lorraine . You are a warm-hearted and bright person and that shines through.
It is a wonderful opportunity for me to be able to share your travels and experience within and out through your book. I find it very interesting and involving, and your life journeys amazing. I cannot yet say anymore, because I am in the middle of reading the book!
Happiness to both of you,

Hi Samadhi,

I am sorry I took so long to write. I need to thank you again for your book. It's really an incredible experience for me to read it every day. I don't know how much courage it takes to live through some of the situations which you lived through without fear. I can only remember and admire that. If I find a piece of it in myself someday, I should only be grateful and happy. We 'win' a reward for everything we do in life. Therefore I believe you deserve all the peace and love in yours. I wish that to you and to your supportive and protective, lovely Lorraine . I also wish you success because I know you, your life and your book deserve it. I did my share and showed the book to a few people and I will go on doing so whenever I get a chance. It's good for them to hear about it [smiles]. I will go on sending you positive energy and love every day from now on, hoping that that would be enough to pay-off for the wonderful gift to know you and share your experience.

In Circles in the Sand, Samadhi takes us on a journey through various countries of the Middle East, making each place come alive with their sent of spices; one can almost hear haggling in the souqs, with carpets rolled out to display the richness of their colours. Mosques—with their minaret craning as a slender neck into the sky—the cry of the muezzin,s call to prayer as he stands at the top of the tower.

Feel Samadhi's anguish as she copes with the enforced black layers of the abaya and covering of her hair, sweltering in the desert heat of Saudi Arabia, struggling with her rage at the veil and its power to deny not only a woman,s face, but her entire being--as if she were a curse to the world of God,s creation.

And yet—at some point—she was compelled to marry a man of this culture. She introduces us to her fiancé,s Syrian family while struggling to adapt to their lifestyle, where in the end she must return home prior to the marriage-- perhaps to the relief of the family. The reader flees with her—from one conformity to another—on what we soon discover is a continual quest of self-discovery and acceptance.

At intervals she revisits her own family in Canada —the scene of the original crime against her humanity—trying to dismantle the dysfunctional barriers, only to be drawn again and again to the desert states.

She describes to us the jewels of Arabian wealth and how they treat it like an entitlement. Working and living in different Arab countries, Samadhi is acutely aware of the segregation of workers from third world countries.

Samadhi penetrates the walls of secrecy--where the veils are temporarily lifted to reveal the private lives of beautiful women living in the shadows of male domination. Not yet realizing that she unknowingly hides behind her own personal veil, compulsively she returns to the desert to examine her damaged femininity. Samadhi seems lured into an environment that is a mirror image of her own life, exposed to paternal domination and a veiled invisibility that she appears to be subconsciously trying to resolve.

With her baggage, stuffed back into her suitcase to be lugged back and forth, she keeps digging circles in the sand—as if answers have been buried within the sands of time. How much digging through drifting sand will it take before Samadhi understands that the heaviness of her bags is from carrying the “crime scene” within her?

In the end, will she finally find peace by accepting herself, her sexuality, allowing an uncompromised femininity, and being acknowledged as a worthwhile, visible woman, worthy of both self-love and God,s love? Will she shed her compulsion to return to the desert to hide behind the veil?


I end by saying, “Samadhi, you are my sister in spirit.”

This is definitely a “can’t put down” book—the kind of book that makes you sorry when the end comes. It’s the tale of an adventurous life, lived at full tilt, without self-pity, despite many hard times. Descriptions of life in VERY foreign lands are both vivid and, at times, very comical.
I’d rate it “Don’t miss!”

I am very impressed with your heartfelt writing style and such honesty in content. Your website is beautiful and outlines yourself and your book beautifully. I didn't realize just how much you have travelled and how much your personal spiritual journey is so key in honouring women who have been persecuted for their innocence. Bless you Samadhi for your sharing of truth in your book and for your ongoing efforts to change the world. Truth opens the doors to change and we all gain. I know many women can identify with your writing and book and even heal reading it.


I thank you Samadhi and many blessing for your big part in breaking the denial of all humans past consciousness around any abuse! Bring it on girl!

Aloha and Mahalo,

What a trip!! Life is such a journey for each of us and to have the blessing of peeking in on the journey of one such soul is a true blessing. We each come here with a map imprinted on our souls that will allow us to learn what we need to learn in order to elevate ourselves to a higher level of love and light.
Samadhi has given us so much insight into her painful journey of denial, fear, incest, rejection, confusion, loss, pain, hopelessness, love and then finally peace. By doing so she has allowed us to view our own journeys under a clearer microscope, with a clearer vision of what we are doing here, this time around….
Thank you Samadhi, you have inspired me beyond words, and may love and light illuminate your path from this day forward.

Hi Samadhi,

It was an honour to meet you at the Body, Soul & Spirit Holistic Fair in Calgary . I want to thank you for the gift you have given in writing this book. Once I started reading, I could not put it down; your writing captivated me and touched parts of my being that had never been examined before.

I have been reading some books on Toltec wisdom and have come across references that women are more adept at progressing spiritually and emotionally than men. In a lot of ways it is women who allow men to dominate – I think your story is a wake up call to women who allow this domination to take away their true sense of self.

All women regardless of their culture will have resonance with some or more of your hardships – bless you for making your story something that women can hold on to.

I know that I felt strengthened and empowered as a woman at the end of the book.

Your courage and honesty is an inspiration to all women.

This book touched my heart and gave me hope that women can survive abuse in all areas and find the strength to heal and move forward in ones life.

I have worked as a counsellor in the area of trauma and abuse, for over twenty years. Themes of healing from trauma and discovering ones sexuality only empower and strengthen ones soul from the inside out. I could relate to the family of origin wounds for all individuals and the ability for Samadhi to discover, heal, and forgive are truly the answers to finding peace and serenity within.

I was touched by each page of absolute honesty and willingness to share her story.

Samadhi, you have changed my life because of this book and reminded me one more time that love does prevail.

Thank you.

This is a wonderful book that should be required reading for any woman dealing with incest, family rejection and blame, or sexual identity issues. The author writes with brutal honesty about herself and her own failings as well as those of her family. Her journey from self-loathing and guilt to acceptance and joy is an inspiration. And her descriptions of her travels in search of herself will resonate with all of us who grew up in the world of the 60's and 70's. Her beautiful prose puts the reader right beside her as she gives us a rare inside-the-family view of the Middle East and its people. Her very personal account of her struggles to free herself from an oppressive family, her battles with serious health problems and her hard-won insights will be of enormous value to anyone on their own search for healing. This book was a joy to read, and I look forward to her new one.

IMPOSSIBLE TO PUT DOWN!

Samadhi's Circles in the Sand is a thought provoking read that I couldn't wait to finish. It is well written and the story flows from start to finish. This is not one woman's struggle; it is every woman's struggle for equality, self respect and self love. I recommend it to everybody.

My only suggestion would be to include maps of the Middle East at the beginning to get a better understanding of Samadhi's travels.

I am reading your book and am finding it a great story.

It is difficult at times to share in your pain. I've been thinking a lot on all the horrid things that we as women do to ourselves to find love and acceptance in our lives. We seem to gravitate to the people who are most likely to never give us what we deserve and ignore those who may.

You mentioned pretending to be happy and that really struck a cord with me as I look at my past relationships and those of my friends and see we are all guilty. Only seeing what we want to see and the parts that worked well and pretending that all is great when in reality it is not.

It is so sad that so many women cannot see their greatness, the goddess energy just lying in wait for the moment to appear. You sure got me thinking about things.....

Samadhi

When Janice gave me your book to read, she did so with such high expectations for the reader. I am delighted to say that I was not disappointed. Janice did say that our stories are parallel in some instances and I really enjoyed how similar our lives were and how aligned with spirit they are for both of us now.

I could not put your book down and it took me less than 2 days to complete it. Upon completion all I could think of was the many people I know personally whom could and would benefit from your story, what obstacles you've overcome and how you went about achieving it.

Thank you. It was heart pounding, shattering and rejuvenating all at once. I will be strongly recommending your book to many in Australia . Love and light to you.

This is a courageous memoir of emotional and spiritual healing from self-hatred and self-abuse to self-affirmation. Samadhi explores painful themes dominating her early life - emotional abuse, incest, religious oppression, and homophobia - and through her story we watch her grow from naive and victimization to strength and self-awareness. An intrepid explorer of both inner and outer worlds, Samadhi searches through other countries and cultures for the deeper reality of the people she meets and for meaningful connection with them, at the same time as she celebrates the precious quality of the short time they share together. Her empathy embraces a broad mix of races, cultures, classes and religions. Of particular interest are her reflections on the Middle East , where she spent several years. She shares her first hand experience with religious dogma and extremism, and she takes a hard look at gender relations. She confronts oppressive authorities throughout her life and her travels, but she comes to realize that her biggest challenge is to confront her own self-oppression. Her book is both a testament to and a celebration of her success in finding her own voice. With its intimate style, it offers a map of the heart for others on their own inner journey.

Keep on writing - it is your art and your gift and your way to help heal the world.

I have finished the book.... Oh my God! There is so much I want to say.

Firstly that I'm so sorry for what you've been through - the agony of reading about your family.

Secondly, and most important, how proud I am of you for many reasons - what you've turned your life experience into is an inspiration.

Third, what a prolific and audience-capturing writer you are. My God, I really couldn't put your book down and everything except being a necessary mum went down the toilet so I could finish it.

I felt all of the emotions that went with each chapter - and all of the peace from the rooftop of Tawam.

You are such a talented writer. Honestly, I was spell bound and the manner in which you delivered your story is prolific. Look up that word and all that it means because it is you--and your talents.

I have been voraciously reading your book, and I'm almost finished - suffice it to say that, at this point, I want to keep reading it and find out what happens next! What a life you have had! You are very brave for putting it down on paper and publishing it.

I am envisioning your book going into the right hands - so that you will be on the bestseller list! Send your book to Oprah! Her viewers would be a prime target for your story...

Okay, I'm done the book now. This story is amazing and poignant in telling your experience of "coming out", growing up in an abusive home, and your experience as a North American woman living in the Middle East . This book captures your spiritual journey and how you have learned to grow as a person and find inner peace. I was pleased to read about the step-by-step process you took with your father in the end, and the sense of wholeness that you were able to transmit in the final chapter. The feeling of peace that you gained, and the "global" realization that you have of being connected to the world around you is an important lesson. I am very thankful that you were able to share it in such a way that is accessible to all.

Samadhi

I just recently started your book, but I have to tell you, it's a real page turner. I am enjoying it immensely. I can't wait to get back to it. Must go now; I have a book to read!

Turning the pages as you unravel each layer of the veil takes you beyond religions, borders or sexual orientation, into the core of the human Spirit. Your heart will travel along the edges of your own insecurities and fears as you explore life through someone else's eyes. Samadhi's amazing journey makes you want to do something, anything, to give your higher self a chance to come into the light, release those butterflies who in turn will give wings to every Soul they touch along the way. As the circles widen and open up, the little flutters of the voice of LOVE is heard.

It is your writing that tells me you are a beautiful woman because your writing is full of beauty.

I have never read such beautiful words since I read Catherine Par Trail.

I am sure those e-mails you receive, from those people who want to hear more of you, will come to something more in your life. It looks like your future path you must follow: If you can get appointments in any part of the earth, got for it! Even if you have to pay part, with this recognition, the publishers will not ignore you.